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clothes suck

For all the giant after-Christmas sales that I nearly killed my wrists to crutch through, all I managed to buy were four pairs of b/w ankle socks, a set of hair ties, and an undergarment.

There's got to be a European equivalent of Hot Topic where I can buy overpriced rebel punk crap. Most Belgian girls, teens, women, and old ladies wear the same exact outfit, and if I'm going to wear anything even remotely similar, I need to accessorize as oddly as possible. Platform military boots would be a good start. Ain't none of those in Mechelen.

all you wanted

I wanted to be like you
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away

I didn't know that it was so cold
And you needed someone
to show you the way
So I took your hand and we figured out
That when the tide comes
I'd take you away

If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares

I'm sinking slowly
So hurry hold me
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone


All you wanted was somebody who cares
If you need me you know I'll be there
Oh, yeah


Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone

oxfam tea

I dreamt that I happened upon the Oxfam store and went inside to ask to purchase some tea. To my surprise, it was a tiny one-room pizza joint, and it only carried Oxfam tea on certain non-consecutive days of the week.

How the hell do I interpret the meaning of that???


"my goals are to get him to pay and to find out how old he is."

wise words from a seasoned dater. i should learn to follow suit.

to have and not to hold

To have and not to hold
So hot, yet so cold
My heart is in your hand
And yet you never stand
Close enough for me to have my way

To love but not to keep
To laugh, not to weep
Your eyes, they go right through
And yet you never do
Anything to make me want to stay


Like a moth to a flame
Only I am to blame
Ba ba da ba ba ba
What can I do?
Ba ba da ba ba ba
I go straight to you
Ba ba da ba ba ba
I've been told
You're to have, not to hold

To look but not to see
To kiss but never be
The object of your desire
I'm walking on a wire
And there's no one at all
To break my fall


You're to have, not to hold
You're to have, not to hold


You're to have, not to hold
You're to have, not to hold
You're to have, not to hold
To break my heart

are men pigs?

Men Overestimate Number Of Sexual Partners
"Psychology professor Dr. Norman Brown said while some people might conclude this happens because 'men are pigs,' there is in fact, important information to be gathered from his survey of approximately 1,100 Albertans..."


Last night I dreamt that I was in some sort of skateboarding contest. The kind that makes my dad complain that I'm too "macho" for my own good. But the distinction of being the only skateboarding carillonneur that I thought belonged to me has been taken away... by someone who's already done everything else I want to do! Guess who that is. Damn it.

Let's see if I survive my twenty-third birthday.

tom yum yummy

It took a lot of effort (or rather, intense hunger) to make me get my ass downstairs at 8 pm to cook dinner for myself for the first time since the accident, but the meal was well worth the ass-busting. Thin pho with tom yum soup, broccoli and cauliflower, and garnished with fresh basil. I've sorely missed my own recipes. It's strange to get "homesick" for one's own cooking, but I suppose it's because I've learned to emulate the food I loved in San Fran and New Haven.

When I went downstairs this morning for breakfast, I felt like the main character in Gattaca, Vincent. He had his legs broken because he was too short and needed to have them lengthened. When the person supplying him with genetic samples "went away," he left Vincent an entire wall full of samples... and there I was going through my cabinets on my broken leg and finding that my parents had stockpiled as much food for me as possible, as well as toilet tissue in the bathroom and everything else they could think of. Come to think of it, did I first watch Gattaca at SSP, or was it at home?

To rewind further, I asked my physical therapist Tom to come early today. Since his only opening was at 9 am, I woke up at 8 and got a few things in order, then lay back down thinking that it would be impossible to fall asleep again. The next moment, he was knocking on the door of my room a little before 9. Stefan had noticed the poor guy ringing the doorbell out in the cold as he was taking the dog out. Despite my flakiness, Tom was super nice, and has offered several times to help me whenever I need him, even if I just want someone to bring me food. He also reads more fantasy novels than anyone I've ever met. Awesome dude.

Best/worst of all, I proved to be on a roll. Around 7:45 pm, my nurse walked into my room while I was showering. Ooops.

It's soooooo beautiful to have real speakers and a subwoofer again.


To be frank, I'm pretty happy with my blogger account, but 1) I needed to take a break from writing my Soros application without actually falling asleep, 2) I am curious to see Tom's livejournal, since he can see mine :-P, and 3) Geert once read my belgiumblog and wie immer teased me about it + most hits to my as-yet not public homepage have been from my blogspot profile, so I guess people actually do read that scheisse, and I should use a private-entry enabled service when I have creative things to say about them. Pardon my french. *evil cackle*